The Dude Therapist

What if the hardest part of being sick isn't the illness itself, but convincing the world you actually have one? This week, Eli sits down with Nicole Pedra, chronic illness advocate, model, and host of the podcast Seen, Not Fixed, for a raw and honest conversation about living with Multiple Sclerosis since age 10. It's a conversation about what happens when your body is fighting a war that nobody else can see, and what it costs to look "fine" when you're anything but. Diagnosed with MS as a kid, Nicole spent years hiding her condition before finally going public. She and Eli dig into why "you don't look sick" is one of the most invalidating things you can say to someone with a chronic illness, and how that able-bodied expectation shapes everything from friendships to first dates. They talk about the shame, isolation, and internalized ableism that so often come with invisible illness, and how Nicole learned to stop apologizing for a body that doesn't always cooperate. The conversation moves into the mind-body connection, and how nervous system regulation actually changes physical symptoms. Nicole shares the grounding tools that keep her steady: art therapy, music, journaling, and creative reading. They also get into the harder conversations, like how and when to disclose a chronic illness to a romantic partner, and why representation of disabled and chronically ill people in media still matters so much. Nicole opens up about her billboard in Times Square with Jollibee and the "I'll show you" mindset that got her there. Eli brings his own experience with Crohn's disease into the mix, including the surprising role his environment played in his healing. If you've ever felt like you had to prove your pain was real, or hide your struggle to be believed, this episode is for you. Topics Covered:  Invisible illness and the "you look fine" problem Nicole's MS diagnosis at age 10 and the years of hiding  Coming out publicly about chronic illness on social media  Selma Blair, Christina Applegate, and Michael J. Fox: celebrity advocacy and its ripple effect  The mind-body connection and nervous system regulation  Grounding tools: art therapy, music, creative reading  Dating and relationships with chronic illness  And more About Nicole Pedra: Nicole Pedra is a chronic illness advocate, public speaker, model, and host of the podcast Seen, Not Fixed, part of Spoonie Productions. Diagnosed with MS at age 10, she uses her platforms to share the unfiltered reality of living with invisible illness and to build community for people who feel unseen. Links and Resources  🎙️ Nicole Pedra on Instagram, and nicolepedra.com  🎧 Nicole’s podcast: Seen, Not Fixed (Spoonly)  📘 Mind Your Body by Nicole Sachs, drawing on the work of Dr. John Sarno  📺 Shrinking (Apple TV+), featuring Michael J. Fox Connect with Eli & The Dude Therapist 📖 From I Do to We Do by Eli Weinstein  🌐 EliWeinsteinLCSW.com  📱 Instagram: @eliweinstein_lcsw  🎙️ Podcast Instagram: @thedudetherapist Chapters 0:00 Intro – The Power of Resilience with Chronic Illness 0:53 Meet Nicole Pedra – Chronic Illness Advocate & Podcaster 2:00 "You Don't Look Sick" – The Invisible Illness Problem 4:09 Shame, Isolation & the Pre-Diagnosis Struggle 12:24 Coming Out Publicly About MS & Finding Community 16:24 The Fear of Disclosure – Work, Modeling & Stigma 24:33 Mind-Body Connection & Nervous System Regulation 29:06 Grounding Tools: Reading, Art Therapy & Music 30:07 Chronic Illness, Self-Worth & Proving Yourself 34:42 "What Doesn't Kill You" – Does It Really Make You Stronger? 42:14 Dating & Relationships with Chronic Illness 48:37 Closing Message: You Are Not Alone Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices